Becoming Her: The Beauty of Never Being Finished
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There’s a strange expectation we sometimes place on ourselves—that at some point, we’re supposed to arrive.
To finally know exactly who we are. To feel confident enough, successful enough, healed enough, strong enough. As if there’s a finished version of ourselves waiting somewhere ahead.
But I’m not sure that version exists.
Becoming Her came from thinking about transformation in a different way. Not as a before and after, but as something that is constantly happening.
The woman in this piece is surrounded by symbols of growth and freedom—sunflowers opening around her, wings stretching upward—but she herself remains partially unfinished. There are loose marks, exposed areas, drips and layers that aren't meant to be resolved.
Because neither are we.
There Is Beauty in the Unfinished
I think we have a tendency to look back at previous versions of ourselves and see all the ways we were different.
Maybe less confident. Less certain. Maybe we made choices we wouldn't make now. Maybe we stayed somewhere too long, held onto something we should have released, or simply didn't know yet what experience would eventually teach us.
But those versions weren't wrong.
They were becoming.
And I think that's something worth remembering when we look at who we are right now, too. We don't need to have everything figured out to appreciate where we are.
Growth isn't always obvious while it's happening.
Sometimes it's loud and life-changing. Other times it's almost invisible—a boundary we finally set, an opinion we stop apologizing for, something we decide to pursue, or simply becoming more comfortable taking up space as ourselves.
The Wings Aren't an Ending
The wings in Becoming Her were important to me because I didn't want them to represent some final transformation.
They're not the finish line.
They're freedom.
The freedom to change. To contradict an earlier version of yourself. To want something different. To begin again. To keep parts of yourself unfinished without feeling the need to immediately fill them in.
And the sunflowers felt like a natural companion to that idea. They turn toward the light, growing in its direction.
Maybe that's all any of us are really doing.
Turning toward whatever feels like light at this particular point in our lives.
Still Becoming
One of the things I've always loved about creating art is that a painting often reveals its meaning while I'm making it. Layers change. Marks get covered and others remain visible. Something imperfect can become the part that gives the entire piece its character.
Life feels a lot like that.
We carry every version of ourselves forward—the beautiful parts, the messy parts, the things we've outgrown, and the things we're still trying to understand.
So Becoming Her isn't really about becoming someone else.
It's about becoming more fully yourself.
And maybe there is no final version.
Maybe we're supposed to remain a little unfinished.
Still learning. Still changing. Still becoming.
— Jen